What Would Be Possible If You Believed That You Are ENOUGH?

I think it is fascinating that as women, we are all subject to those universal “not enough” thoughts (not smart enough, not thin enough, don’t know enough….) and those “not worthy” thoughts. These beliefs inform a painful feeling of being unlovable or feeling like we don’t belong. We all have these thoughts that keep us disconnected from ourselves, from others, from our desired feelings, from creating things we want for ourselves in our lives.

Rather than deep analysis or introspection, what if today, we decide to stop, get curious, and turn those awful “not enough” thoughts upside down. What to play? (Hint: Answer “yes”.)

Let’s explore:
If we don’t feel worthy enough, that means we feel less than worthy, or worthless (think of it as two words: worth less). Worth less than whom? Who says? Who is measuring? Who made the scale? Why do I believe it?

Let’s start with a quiz. Answer the below statements* true or false. “Yes, I believe that to be true about myself.” or “No, I don’t believe that to be true about myself.”

I’m a natural-born winner: always have been, always will be.
The world is full of people who would love to be my friends.
I’ll always have plenty of money.
I deserve a life full of joy and fulfillment.
I’m physically beautiful, and I always will be.
I can be wildly successful at my chosen career.
I have an amazingly capable brain.
I’m perfectly lovable exactly as I am.
I’m highly creative by nature.
My dreams are in the process of coming true.
Tally up how many you responded with “Yes, I believe that to be True about myself.” Now, how many did you answer, “No, that is not true for me?”

If you scored anything less than 10, you failed. (Kidding! There’s no failing in life coaching.)

Here’s the universal Truth: Every single one of these is inherently True for YOU. Let me say that again, every single one of these statements is True for YOU.

THERE IS NO-THING THAT YOU HAVE TO DO TO MAKE THEM TRUE.

Notice how the voice in your head is feeding you all kinds of self-critical thoughts.
Notice if the voice is full of self-judgment.
Notice how those thoughts are truly shitty.

If the voice in your head is anything like mine, she may be going off the rails right now. Do me a favor and tell her this: “If I spent one hour with Jill, she would show me how they are all true for me. So for the purpose of these 10-15 minutes, I’m spending with myself today, I’m going to suspend self-judgment and believe all of these statements are true for me.”

There are so many different ways that I use this exercise in my coaching practice. It's incredibly telling and will show me ways to zero in to help you move through self-judgment and comparison, and highlight the ways that perfectionism, over-achieving, playing small, thinking of yourself from a place of scarcity and lack, and more are keeping you from thriving.

My greatest hope is for you to believe that you are wildly extraordinary, to be excited about who you are, and to feel hopeful and enthusiastic about your life! I want you to forgive yourself and accept yourself and enjoy this life that you are living! Friend, it is time to free yourself from those not-enough and unworthy thoughts that you have for yourself and allow the burden of holding judgement of others dissipate.

*An exercise from Martha Beck’s “Finding Your Own North Star.”

This is just an example of the extremely doable and life-changing work that we do in The Courage Connection, my signature group program. We kick things off in February and I would love to see you there. If you’re interested, just hit reply and let’s talk. I can’t wait to share more about the program with you!

Courageously Yours,